Did you know that so much of our behavior, including how we react to others (i.e. our kids, spouse/partner), is directed not only by our emotions, but by what we are telling ourselves in those moments?
In my work with parents, I often ask if they’re aware of what they may be telling themselves during stressful interactions with their kids. After some thought, they often tell me that their “self-talk,” as we call it, typically sounds something like, “I can’t believe this is happening AGAIN!” “Why can’t h/she just LISTEN already?” “I can’t take this anymore!” “Seriously?!?” “What’s WRONG with you?”
Sound familiar?
What if I told you that changing your thoughts could change your behavior and your reactions? I invite you to try it.
Next time you are faced with a stressful or heated interaction with your kids, PAUSE. Check in with what you may be telling yourself in that moment. Challenge and/or replace the thought(s).
Some examples:
“It seems my child hasn’t learned how to ____ YET.”
“I can handle this.”
“This isn’t an emergency.”
“Focus on connecting instead of correcting.”
“Calm begets calm.”
“This too shall pass.”
Wishing you a day filled with more calm and less chaos.
-Debbie